a cloudy me..

cloudy cloudy...i hope my day is only either sunny or rainy...and aint cloudy...i wonder sometime it is because of my stupidity hurt others...im really sorry to all...i dont intend to do so..but then, if i do, at least tell me...its better if u could scold me or angry but not making a lot sort of things that makes me feel guilty or makes me feel bad...its really sad and frusfrating to know that a friend avoid me because i did something bad...kick me on my ass..i dont even care...just dont remain silent..its really...hurtful..T_T

dont say u are okay when i know there is something bad there...dont say ntg when ur face show it all...dont make me cry for something i dont even sure....its even cruel than u killing me...or hurting me with words...just like cloudy days..where we couldnt sure if it is going to rain or the day will turn sunny...i hate it..i seriously hate it...sighhhhhhhhhhhhhh

for a moment like this, now i really wanted a friend to hug on...but who can i find..who is willing to borrow me their shoulder for me to cry on...nobody but to bear it myself...maybe some are right...i should get a boyfriend...funny me, only to realise this at this time...

to all : im sorry..i know im a jackass..im really sorry for every word i deliver that hurts uu..im really sorry...but believe me, i dont intend to do so...T_T