Biased

i had so much to say but each and everytime i get to say it, or even to type it here

i become tongue-tight..


in this friendship, can i still hold on??
should i still hold on???

should i still find myself a reason to stay???
a reason for myself to call a friend a friend????

does this heartache mean i still care for this friendship????

i am confused...if being in as friend hurts me so much, why is it still called friend??
if within friends, grouping happen, isolation happen.. is this still call friends??

being outcast twice in a relationship, why cant i still learn to heal my own heartache???


......

conclusion : i am dumb!